It's been almost 2 years since I've last written in here..but I guess I want to get my thoughts written down somewhere and see if it'll help...

Things haven't actually been smooth lately, in fact, it's been really rocky. My emotions and my body is drained, I look awfully tired, but I'm slowly gaining my energy back because I know I have to fight with all my might. I love him too much to give up, so I will keep trying, at least he is willing to try as well, if we get through this, I know our relationship will be so much stronger. No one is perfect, and although I've opened up a lot and changed my ways, I still have faults because I'm not perfect, no one is. The past is an experience to say the least, I am only going to look into the near future, as long as we are happy together that is all that will matter. When two people are together, they should compliment each other and better one another, I truly believe that, and I know Kelvin compliments me well. It just takes a lot of time, understanding and effort for any relationship to work, and I am willing to play my part.

School is going to be tough, lots to do, and I am not going to give up... I will stress myself out, yank my hair out if i have to, but i know i cant give up...

guess that's all i have on my mind...

Saturday November 27, 2004

Had to go to Aberdeen yesterday for the CCF Press Conference, as well as the award ceremony for the photo contest...my picture..i guess is okay? Could be better, but cant help it, my face is so ugly >.< Went home around 6pm, showered, took off the makeup and rested a little then drove to Ra's house hehe... great to see my highschool friends again..felt so comfortable  And I could be myself... wearing glasses, no makeup, jeans... it was nice... it was hot pot too... yummy yummy, thx thx Ra and Shir for serving me hehe..felt like a princess keke... Left around 11ish.. wanted to go home cuz i was tired, but a friend called and I chatted a bit in richmond with him before heading home~

Sunday November 28, 2004

Went out to lunch with my parents, we went for tea...yummy =) then I went to downtown to look for a dress, my friend accompanied me there. Dresses are so expensive  went to zioni and the dresses were $350... it looked okay but i'm not use to fitted dresses so I didnt get it right away and kept looking..the last place we went to was BCBG and there was a dress thats kidna pretty..but $550... eh...NOWAY man..not gonna spend a fortune for it..not worth it, at least for the occassion... went home and my sister in law brought up 2 dresses. One of them was a dress I was originally gonna wear for her wedding, she still had it  it's a bit loose so my mom is gonna alter it, then it'll be perfect...now i just have to look for gold shoes tmr..the stress is lowered hehe.. But really happy my friend went to downtown with me...feel bad that he accompanied me and i didnt get anything and he was tired..but hehe... I think he'll be alright~ Time to take a relaxing hot shower...

This entry is dedicated to all my friends, whom i love so much !!

i am so so so so TOUCHED !! my friends care about me so much... I can cry... thanks to my friends who called me long distance from hong kong just to tell me they are supporting me, thanks for those sending me icq, msn, friendster msgs to remind me to take care and take it easy, thanks for those who call me just to leave a msg on my voice mail or to see how i am doing.... I truly am touched...thanks to those who are voting for me so many times a day... and to people who are spreading the word for me... I feel so much love... so much.... I'm the worlds luckiest girl right now...I have so much love and support... I will try my best, and i will take care of myself... thanks for every little thing my friends do for me... I love you guys so much....   

Happy Birthday To My Daddy

There has been so much that I've been doing after the press conference I dont remember the details...I just remember that we had the photo contest @ aberdeen on the 13th, then on 15th, 16th, 17th we had to do shooting that will be aired on the 10th of December...man... had to wake up at 5am during those 3 days of shooting and i didnt get home until 7ish 8pm at night...tiring days... >.< during the 17th I was freezing cuz we did the shooting outside and i was in a skirt..my legs shook so badly..but the catwalk instructor was so sweet..she made this chinese tea for me right after cuz she said i was looking pale and tat i must take care of myself...so sweet of her..like a mommy...

Saturday, November 20, 2004

Did another radio promotion yesterday...err...one take and that was it..i studdered so much..but haha..it's NATURAL keke...so dont laugh if u are so unlucky to hear it... left the studio @6ish...rushed home, changed to comfy clothes with my runners then headed to Elsa's house for the potluck dinner...mmm...the food was so yummy....mouth watering..but errr...the singing and dancing that some people did..... haha..no comment... but most girls in the group can sing...i feel so bad..i totally cant sing...so i didnt hehe...

After that we left around 11ish or was it 12am..i forgot..then me and Icho went to take sticker pictures hehe..then my friend called and we went to sing k... lalalalala...as usual i listened..but i enjoyed listening to them sing k cuz their so good...envy them so much... got home around 4ish..and slept until now...